Just an Itty-Bitty Miracle

Some miracles are huge, like the sudden healing of my son's aneurysm, sparing him from almost certain death – and some are just little evidences of God's presence in our lives.

My experience today is of the latter variety – just a little itty-bitty miracle.

In my last home, I had a wonderful solarium where I spent time talking to God and praying for my family and other concerns. My glass patio table was perfect for studying because the design  accommodated a leaf from the dining room table and so I could have all my Bible study books right there without being piled all over the table.

In this new place, everything fit perfectly except the glass table. There was no room for it and so it has been sitting forlorn in storage. I've been feeling miscombobulated because I haven't figured out a designated spot for study.

This morning, I said, "Lord, You must know how I could arrange things so that I'd have a designated spot to meet with You and study Your Word..."

No sooner had I prayed the prayer than the perfect solution popped into my head. All I had to do was move the love seat in my bedroom from the window area, put it at the foot of my bed, move the glass table to where the love seat had been and bingo - a perfect, designated prayer and study spot!

So - you don't think this was grand enough to qualify for a miracle? That's okay because I do. I guess you kinda had to be there! :)

Home

Finally unpacked in my new home! After all the drama of having to move and struggling to find God's direction for the path ahead – I'm home!

My friend Jane-Anne stayed until about 2 a.m. after the movers left on Wednesday and we plowed through box after box, eventually turning confusion into the cozy charm of a my new abode. We were exhausted (having been up since 6 a.m.), hot and sweaty with the high humidity, but determined to finish the kitchen, living room and dining room that night. Indulging in intermittent showers, we finally put the last detail in place.

Every once in awhile during the move, the Lord would give me a special little boost – like the little scripture in the bottom of a box, handwritten my my mom who died in 2005, "Old things have passed away – all things have become new," and the little scrap of paper that spiraled from nowhere to the floor – a scrap with a hand-drawn ballerina on one side and a little note on the back, "I love you Grandma, love Bethany." Treasures amid the mess.

Today, I've organized my office and am back at my computer, ready for the next leg of this journey called "life." I wonder what is ahead. It was so strange that I had to move and my work with 100 Huntley Street ended at the same time. I know God has a plan – but what is it?

When my life came crashing down in 2006 and I had to go back to school and develop a new career, I desperately needed income. One Wednesday afternoon, Jane and Jane-Anne and I were praying that God would open a door for work for me. When I got home, there was a message on my answering machine from Karen Stowell, the editor of the Crossroads Compass, asking if I would be interested in being the graphic designer for the magazine! The message noted that a couple of other people were being considered for the position, but if I was interested, I could let her know. That information didn't worry me one whit, because I knew the job was mine! There was no way that our prayer could be followed by such a remarkable 'coincidence!' This was a God-incidence and I knew it. I just had to wait for confirmation – and it came a week later! That was the beginning of a wonderful 22 months of designing the Compass with Karen, followed by two months where I was given the position of interim managing editor while Crossroads made the transition to doing the magazine internally with its merger with CTS.

And now I'm ready for the next step. How wonderful to know that the God of the Universe is my agent, out there opening the doors for my career path. Sometimes I think it would be so amazing if He could just phone and deliver His messages!

NOTE - Please pray for my sister Dona who will have surgery for colon cancer on Aug. 3rd.

Prayer

Today, rather than sharing a story of something wonderful God has done, I'm asking for prayer for two more miracles. I just found out today that two very special people, my sister Dona and a friend, Carol Ann Carter, have been diagnosed with cancer – Dona in her colon and Carol Ann in her breast. Please pray for both of them for recovery. Dona has five grandchildren and a son and a daughter and their spouses who love her so dearly an would miss her terribly if anything should happen to her. Carol Ann has a son and a daughter with a very rare disease and she is so needed by her family.

The moving truck will arrive tomorrow morning at 8 a.m., so I'd better get back to Port Perry (I've been working at the new place in Uxbridge) and get some sleep!

Amazing!

Another day packing, loading, unpacking box after box as I travel back and forth from my home of four years to my new digs. The moving van will arrive bright and early Wednesday morning, but I'm trying to accomplish as much as possible myself because I'll be paying the movers twelve dollars for every five minutes of their time! Once again I'm writing when very tired, but I must share the amazing goodness of God.

This has been a crazy time. When I was told three months ago that I had to move, I found it very difficult to look for, much less find, a place to rent – and now I believe that it was because God had a perfect spot prepared for me, but His timing had to be synced with the circumstances. I now wonder if the unfruitful journey of exploring the possibility of purchasing may have been a diversion to keep me busy while the right home for me was being prepared. Had I settled for renting the best thing I could find at that time, I would have missed God's best!!!!

I first met Dennis, my new landlord (a distant cousin), on July 5th, just two days before I hoped to have the down payment for the house I hoped to purchase. The one week extension on the condition gave me time to think more deeply about the possibility of renting from Dennis. By the time I realized that the down payment wasn't going to materialize, I had switched mental gears from the diversion that had kept me occupied, to the actual provision of the Lord.

This afternoon, my friends (Jane and Jane Anne) arrived to help, neither being aware that the other was coming. It was so exciting to take them together to see the new place. We loaded up their vans and my car and off we went for the 15 minute trek from Port Perry to Uxbridge. When we arrived at the new place, they were amazed to see how perfectly it fits my needs - just the right size, beside a park for Lola, kitchen cupboards that match the wood of my furniture, wall colours that could not have been more perfect if they had been chosen with swatches of my fabrics, a landlord who has worked so hard to make everything perfect for me, living in the same house with his delightful mother (downstairs) who loves the Lord, having family (albeit distant) right there for me, a fireplace, beautifully appointed, etc. etc.

The fact that the house number is #7 was not lost on Jane and Jane Anne – the number of God's completion! The fact that I was born in Uxbridge, have lived all across Canada and am now returning to the place of my birth has special significance. It feels so right.

Tonite as I prepare for bed, I am in awe at the goodness of the Lord and His provision. He did it! He planned it, prepared it, provided it and now I can rest in His fulfilled promise to care for me. It is truly amazing to be able to see the pieces of His plan fall into place. Thank you, Lord. You are amazing. :)

Praying For our Pets

As I write, Lola (my four-year-old cockapoo) is curled at my feet with no desire to be anywhere else in this wide world – or to be with anyone else. She and I happily co-habitate in the simple delight of each other's company.

Pets are wonderful gifts from God. Following my divorce, I was very lonely and shall never regret adopting Lola. She truly has been a life saver.

I have had many pets through the years – cats named Pasha, Geraldine, Zoe, Agatha, Clara Tabiltha, Mrs. Krinkletail, Sox, Hooligan Gilligan, Mr. Gump, Brother and Portia; dogs named Waggo, Zsa-Zsa, Samantha, Beaureguard, Morgan, Summer, Bailey, Zachariah, Charli and Lola; a bird named Theopholus and a raccoon named Farley.

From time to time, they have had physical challenges as we all do. However, from experience, I have found that we can ask God to heal our pets and He will!

There was a time when Tabitha almost lost her house privileges! She started to urinate in the corners of the house and on soft things like pillows! Before banishing her to kitty heaven, I took her to the vet, where she was diagnosed as having crystals in her urine – a very painful malady because the crystals are difficult to pass. Her prognosis was not good. The doctor aid he had never seen such a severe case!

I'll never forget laying my hands on that sweet little cat, asking God to heal her. Lo and behold – He did. From that day forward, she never had another painful crystal attack.

Tabitha is now living with my friends, John and Nancy Bobaljik, who adopted her and Clara when I had to move from my house. They have taken such wonderful care of those cats that they are now 16 years old! Thank you Lord, for taking care of even little Hooligans!!

Casting Bread Upon the Waters

Here it is after midnight again and I'm just starting to blog. I've been moving all day and am exhausted, but feel great because I got my new kitchen all organized today - must take some pics for the blog.

My new landlord has been wonderful about getting everything tickety-boo for me before the big move. He's been putting up crown molding, painting, installing a new washer/dryer etc. etc. - all very physical stuff and tonight he was telling me how much pain he is in daily with his back. He went on to describe the seriousness of his condition. I was amazed because he has been working so hard with no complaint. I asked him if I could pray for his back and he agreed, so I did.

I told him about a young girl by the name of Misty who had had a similar condition to his. She had fallen out of a truck at the age of 16 and was unable to ski or do other active things with her friends. She wasn't a Christian, but one night there was a faith-healer speaking in Lindsay and I asked her if she'd like to go with me and see whether God might heal her. She agreed, but the speaker gave no opportunity for anyone with back problems to receive healing that night. It was all about headaches, rotater cuff problems, etc. On the way home, I asked Misty if she was disappointed. When she nodded that yes, she was, I said, "Well  if God is God, then He should be able to heal you just as well in your kitchen as at a church. Do you want me to pray for you when we get to your place?" Misty agreed, but in my mind I was thinking, "Lord  what have I done? If you don't heal this girl, You and I could end up looking very silly, very fast!"

When we arrived at her place (a charming old, two-storey farmhouse), I arranged two kitchen chairs facing each other and asked her to place the heels of her feet in my hands. I could tell that one leg was longer than the other. When I asked her about it, she said yes, that she knew it was, but the doctor couldn't do anything about it. He had suggested the possibility of having to fuse her spine when she got older.

In the Name of Jesus I spoke to her skeletal system and commanded it to come under the authority of the Lord Jesus Christ and to be properly aligned according to His perfect creation. When nothing happened, I spoke to her body once again in the Name of Jesus. Suddenly I realized that the heels of her feet were even.  When I asked her if she felt anything happening, she exclaimed, "Yes! I feel as though my back is being pulled right out!"

I suggested that she stand up and see what was happening. She wriggled around and could hardly believe that the familiar pulling was no longer there! She then ran up and down the full flight of steps in great excitement. I told her that it seemed to me as though God loved her so much that he had given her a miracle that millions of people in the world would love to have, revealing His reality to her. Further, I said that if I were her, I'd be accepting Him into her heart. She agreed and we prayed together for salvation and the infilling of the Holy Spirit. It was very exciting!

Now – will my new landlord experience the same healing? I don't now. The outcome is not my responsibility. I simply did what I was supposed to do as a believer (Mark 16) which is to lay my hands on the sick and pray for their recovery. The rest is up to God – but I can hardly wait to see what He is going to do!

Coincidences – or God's Fingerprints?

In 2005, I discovered that I had a brother, five years older than I – my father's only son. I had always wanted a big brother but never dreamt that it would happen like this. I cried for three days, mourning the loss of the reality I had known, before concluding that I needed to celebrate this new relationship and enfold it into my new reality.

When Richard discovered that he had a sister who writes, he decided to try his hand at it and started whipping off novels, not to publish, just for his own interest. I was amazed! It seemed that there was nothing he could not do.

At the time, I was in the middle of writing my first work of fiction. I suggested that we should exchange our manuscripts and critique each other's writing. Richard agreed and, because we live a three-day's journey apart, we both bundled up our unfinished epistles and took them to the post-office, knowing they would doubtless cross in the mail.

My package had contained 372 pages. When I received Richard's package, I was stunned to unwrap 372 pages.

This might not seem like a miracle in the ordinary sense of the word, but when God is at work in a situation, it seems as though there are far too many "coincidences" to be normal, run of the mill, happenings. I like to call them "God-incidences." We don't always know why they happen but I love to see His fingerprints in my life. :)

Reassurance

Okay – so I'm human. Although I've accepted the fact that I can't purchase my own home yet and have to rent again, I'm  ticked off about having to move. If I could see purpose in this move beyond my landlord needing the space for his newly-acquired family, I wouldn't have a problem. If I knew for sure that God had a purpose, I'd be totally on side. However, from my present perspective, all I see is the huge job of moving, the confusion of changing my address and contact info, and a monumental interruption to my work. I am unhappy about losing my hill (my place for prayer and meditation), having to store the lawn furniture my sons made and having to move to a different (although nearby) town.

So - it was in that frame of mind that I decided last night not to go to Bible study at the Embassy this morning. I would stay home and work instead.

However, when morning came, I awoke earlier than planned and I knew that I was to go to Bible study. Margie was teaching a very simple subject - "God is Good, Satan is Bad." I wasn't too sure how much I would learn from something so basic, but I was about to find out!

Margie asked us to turn to Nahum 1:7, "He cares for those who trust Him." Pretty basic stuff, but as I thought about those words, the reassurance of God's presence, even in these circumstances, was profound. I do trust Him – so He will care for me, even though I may feel as though I'm being sent out on a limb by myself.

Margie went on to say that the darkest place in a person's life can be their greatest time of promotion. God doesn't usually share His plans with us. We just have to trust that He is leading if we're seeking His path.

Then Margie asked us to turn to Psalm 84:5–7. When I went to find Psalms, my Bible flipped open right to that passage! How does that happen in a book with 2172 pages??????

As I read the words, I knew God was speaking directly to me about the journey I'm on. "Blessed are those whose strength is in You, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. As they pass through the valley of weeping, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools. They go from strength to strength till each appears before God in Zion."

My strength is in Him. Even though I may get down and depressed about it, this move can be a place of refreshing and joy as I give it to God for His working. God will not abandon me. He is taking me from a season of weeping to a new place of refreshing. I need to leave my grumbly thoughts behind and walk forward with praise to God and gratitude for His wonderful provision. The house I will be renting is lovely. Lola is welcome and the owner is being very kind to me. I shall look ahead with joy. I shall not risk looking back and being turned into a pillar of salt!

It is truly miraculous how God can take words written over 2000 years ago and apply them freshly to my life today! Thank you Lord!! :)

A Miracle Birth

My youngest son, Todd, and his wife Jenny recently welcomed their first child – Noah Tennyson Chaytor-Lee – a beautiful name for a beautiful child. If there could be a perfect entry into the world, that would be the birth story of little Noah.

Not so with his father! Three months into my 1973 pregnancy with Todd, we moved to Montreal. Because my then-husband was already working there, it was up to me to pack up our Ontario home and move the family. Boxes had to be packed, heavy things had to be lifted and I did what I had to do, all the while looking after my active, eldest son. On top of the physical stress, there was tremendous emotional stress in our marriage.

At five months pregnant (now living in Montreal and away from family support) I went into labor. While the pains eventually subsided, my doctor feared that there had been a separation of the placenta. He warned us that if the child made it through the pregnancy, it would probably have severe disabilities and that we should begin thinking about institutions for his care.

In the seventies, there was little understanding of the effect of nicotine or alcohol on a developing fetus. At the time, I was not a Christian and was smoking a couple of packs of cigarettes every day. To make matters worse, the obstetrician's directions included four months of bed rest, during which time I was supposed to have a drink of alcohol whenever I felt any twinges of labor pains. The result was that I stayed half cut on Cointreau for the last four months of the pregnancy, sitting in bed doing jigsaw puzzles, chain smoking and eating my way up to 200 pounds! If the baby hadn't been disabled at the beginning of the pregnancy, one would certainly think that I was ensuring disaster!

However, my mother and others were praying. My mom did a lot of praying in those years!

Nine months finally passed and the real deal labor began. However, with no exercise for four months, I was totally out of shape and had no muscles. Thirty-two and a half hours later, my beautiful little red-headed boy was born, perfect in every way except that his head was so big that the doctor did tests for hydrocephaly. It turned out that his head was so big simply because of all the brain power locked inside! (And maybe because he['s so gorgeous!)

Long story short, God answered Mom's prayers. Todd was an Ontario Scholar in high school, developed a wonderful personality and went on to McMaster University where he excelled in everything he did, earning honours degrees in both natural sciences and computer sciences. He now develops software for medical devices in Waterloo, the Silicon Valley of Canada.

Todd has always been a very special gift to me, a son of whom I am very proud and a constant friend all through the years. A true miracle - by God's design. Thank you Mom, for your prayers.

Buck Teeth and a Marathon

The material I had to work with for my first book with Rev. Gordon Williams (Like a Rushing Mighty Wind) was so rich with stories of miracles that it was difficult to choose one for the introduction.

We settled on the story of a little girl with buck teeth who asked Jesus for a miracle and received one. The Preface began...

  “'Do you want to see what Jesus did for me?'
    I looked down at the eleven-year-old freckled face smiling broadly up into my own.  The face looked vaguely familiar, and I began to remember praying for the child in the previous night’s prayer line.
    And then it hit me.  This little girl’s top lip had protruded badly with very pronounced buck teeth — and here she was, just one night later, with perfectly aligned, beautiful teeth!
    'He fixed them,' she announced with shy pride."

When we asked David Mainse, then the host of 100 Huntley Street to write the Foreword for the book, he requested confirmation of the remarkable miracle. At Gordon's direction, I wrote to Dr. Duvall, the little girl’s dentist, who was happy to comply. He replied, “I hereby verify the portion of Gordon Williams’ Preface to be correct regarding the changes in the girl’s dentition. You may use my name with this book if needed.”
 
Dr. Duvall went on to say that having witnessed the transformation in his young patient, he met with Gordon and shared that he, personally, had a bad back and had been in serious pain for many years.  Gordon suggested that the doctor should attend one of his meetings, and so he did — that night.  The doctor’s back was healed, and he has run the “Iron Man Marathon” every year since! 

Dr. Duval wrote,  “I have an interesting story for you.  During our lunch (with Gordon Williams) at the Old House Restaurant, I expressed my astonishment at faith healing. After considerable thought, I went ahead and asked Jesus for healing of my fifteen year lower back problem. That night, my back hurt like .... and after praying, there was no pain. The next morning, I arose from my bed carefully.  Again, no pain, although the lower back muscles were very tense.  Since I run 5–10 miles every day, I would come home hurting if I ran more than 1 hour per day.  I now run 25 miles with no pain, and I am entering a couple of marathon races.  Not only that, but I run relatively fast (for me).  How about that ... me — a member of the health profession, being healed by prayer!”

How about that indeed? :)


 

Miracle of Restoration

With all the uncertainty of this move, I have felt as though my life is totally upside down. I have not been able to focus on my work and, with all my belongings packed in boxes, everything is in disarray.

In the midst of all of this, Jane-Anne invited me to her cottage for a couple of days and I accepted gladly – anything to escape the confusion. The thought of serenity beside a lake was most welcome.

What follows may not seem like a miracle, but the restoration that has taken place since my arrival yesterday is truly remarkable. This morning, I recorded my musings, sitting on the deck:

"Cottage air, finally filling my senses. Morning breeze against my cheek. Boat gunnel guards bobbing against dock wood. Leaves whispering. Waves lapping on wet rocks. Lola paws pattering across the wet deck.

Ruth (Jane-Anne's mom) comes around the corner of the cottage and hangs a wet mat over the railing, a yellow jacket over the towel wrapping her lower body.

Reaching back in my mind, I find days of love, wrapped in the family that gave me life.

The breeze is familiar. The leaves whisper the same secrets of Creation they told at my childhood family cottage - the simple knowledge of the love of God.

I belong where I am  enfolded by nature, cedar droppings under my bare feet.

I can't stay here. This is not my life - not my cottage... but the breeze is mine. The air that gives me breath is mine. The sounds live in my memories.

I am so grateful to find these things that are mine once again. To soak in the sounds, to rest in the breeze."

A Bird in the Hand...

My son Timothy has led a very adventurous life, for which I am sure God has had to commission a whole legion of angels for protection! Tim is now 40 and a Forensic Fire Investigation Engineer and I am very proud of him, but there have been more hills and valleys in his life than there are crossing the Rockies to reach him where he now resides in B.C. with his family.

When Tim was 12, he was visiting friends of our family on a farm. Their two-story farm house had a steep roof, over which was a tree branch where a mother bird had chosen to build her nest and raise her young. When the boys discovered one of the babies that had fallen out of the nest, hero Tim decided that he needed to return the little bird to its mother.

Carrying the baby in his pocket, he made his way up to the top of the roof, managed to reach the nest and tucked the little bird back in its home.

Then he started to make his way down the steep roof. Suddenly, he lost his grip and began to slide, faster and faster down the roof! He thought he'd be able to grab the eaves trough when he reached the edge - but that didn't happen. His legs shot over the side of the roof and into the air! Amazingly, there was a clothesline strung about halfway between the stories. Tim's legs shot between the upper and lower lines. Grabbing the top line as he whizzed through, he suddenly found himself sitting, swinging on the bottom line!

Just a crazy coincidence? I don't think so. It was a miracle - by design. :)

The Miracle of Death

People talk all the time about the "miracle of life." It is very fresh in my heart with the arrival of Noah, my newest grandson, in March. There is no disputing the miracle of ten perfect little toes and ears that unfold like petals.

But how about the miracle of ten gnarled toes and ears that no longer hear as easily as they once did - when they leave this world?

My mom and I were very close. On the night she died at the age of 96, I was stroking her hair, lying on the bed beside her, singing an old hymn that I hadn't heard for years, "Shall We Gather at the River." I was surprised when Mom said, "Oh, I wish we could just jump across!"

"You mean jump across the river Mom?" I asked.

She said yes. I know that Mom had hung on to life because she knew I still needed her. My life and marriage were not happy. I tried to be everything for everybody and cherished Mom as my refuge from the world - the embodiment of everything fine, everything that made sense in the world, everything that understood and really loved me. But I knew it was time to let her go.

"Mom, would you like me to pray and ask Jesus to take you home to heaven?" I knew the words could no longer be delayed. Mom said yes.

As I prayed, Mom suddenly said, "Victor!" with surprise and great delight. And again, "Victor!"

I was puzzled and asked, "Mom - are you seeing Uncle Victor?"

Her words were weak, but filled with joy. "Yes!" She gently slipped away with the brother she loved and was gone within just a few short moments.

I sat beside her, my precious mom, feeling no sense of loss whatsoever. It was as though she had simply gone into another room and I would see her later. I wondered what I should do now. It occurred to me that I had not done her nails that day. I had meant to give her a manicure, but it simply had not happened. So - I got the nail file and polish and sat there and did her nails as though it was the most natural thing in the world. Then, I called the nurse to pronounce and the funeral home to remove her body.

When the nurse arrived, she asked if my mom had been a Christian. I assured her that she had, but inquired why she asked.

"Because she has such a peaceful expression.," she said. "I see a lot of people at the time of death and almost invariably, the Christians have that same peaceful expression, while it's much different with non-believers."

After everyone left, I went up to my bedroom. It was two a.m. and I felt at loose ends. I wondered what people do when they've just lost someone so precious to them. I clicked on my TV and Nite Lite was just starting. The topic (no kidding) was "What do you do when you've just lost someone you love?" I couldn't believe it! I had hosted that program for seven years, and so called in to tell the screener (who was a friend of mine) how incredibly timely the topic was for me. I told him about Uncle Victor coming to meet Mom and the nurse's comment about the peaceful expression Christians have in death. He insisted that I go on air and tell the story and so there I was, at 2 a.m., telling the whole nation (or anyone who was up and tuned in) about my mom and the miracle of her death.

Despite the fact that I've missed Mom, I've never grieved for her. I'll see her again - and what a joyful miracle that will be!!!!

Miracles of Sudden Inspiration

A few years ago, I was sitting at dinner with friends at a writers' conference (Write Canada!). They began to discuss the poetry contest which was to be judged later that night. I had forgotten to submit anything, but when it was announced that submissions would still be accepted until the end of dinner, I quickly grabbed a pen from my purse and began to scribble. The topic we had been given was, "Compare an Orange to a Sheep." Can you imagine? What a crazy challenge!

I prayed that God would give me something and here is what developed in the space of about 10 minutes:

THE ORANGE AND THE SHEEP

"Baa," said the little sheep,
Have you any soul?"
"No sir, no sir,
But God gave me a goal."

"I," said the juicy orange
Am not lowly as you think,
For in my triune being,
I am a God-man link!"

"My skin, my juice, my seed
Are three and yet I'm one,
A reminder in man's need
Of Father, Spirit and the Son."

"Baa," said the little sheep,
"You think you are so rare;
Look at me - God chose me
To symbolize His care."

From up above a voice broke through!
The orange and sheep stopped speaking.
"Stop arguing, you witless two
And hear what I am saying."

"Though one is hard and one is soft,
Not unlike every man,
Each in your special, unique way
Reflects Creation's plan!"

That night, there was a poetry challenge awards ceremony. When I say I won first prize, it's not to blow my own horn. I was probably more shocked than anyone. It was just a silly little poetry contest.  My point in brushing the dust off of it tonight is just to share another example of God's activity in our lives. I sincerely believe He gave me a gift of sudden inspiration that night – a little miracle for fun - by design!

Miracles of Preparation

Even though things did not turn out as I had hoped with the purchase of my own home, I have seen God's hand at work in this move.

I mentioned previously how the last four years have been a great challenge financially as I worked to rebuild my life. I have just barely gotten to the place where I'm holding my own and able to pay my bills even though there's not much left over.

In April, I learned that my job designing the Crossroads Compass would be ending because of the merger of Crossroads and CTS and the subsequent duplication of services. During the two-month transition, however, I was asked to do not only my job, but also that of my previous boss as managing editor of the magazine. Not only did it mean that I would have the opportunity to implement some of my ideas to make the magazine more interactive, but I would be paid three times my normal salary for those two months! It was very exciting and I looked forward to finally having some surplus!

Not so fast! In May – bingo – along came word that I would have to move, necessitating a variety of expenditures that would have been far beyond my ability to manage, had it not been for the Crossroads situation. I was amazed at God's provision in preparation for the coming expenses.

And then there was the matter of the apartment in Uxbridge into which I'll be moving in a couple of weeks. While my early efforts to find a place large enough to suit my needs where Lola would be welcome were fruitless, when it came right down to the crunch last week, along came the availability of this place – a port in the storm should the house deal fall through (which it did). I'll have the main level of a bungalow about 100 sq. ft. larger than what I now have. It is right next to a park where I'll be able to run Lola off leash.

So there it was –  God's hand of miraculous preparation for things I didn't even know I'd need - all along the way, by His design!

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #39 – 14 days to Move

Whew! That was close! Had I not needed a miracle to buy this house, I would have gone ahead on my own and taken a step that was obviously not in God's plan. One great thing about not having a lot of resources is being dependent on God for every step. If it's not a step towards His best plan, He simply won't provide the resources for it!

Disappointed? Yes - but "weeping may endure for the night - but joy cometh in the morning!" I'll get over it and life will go on.

Last night, Jane and Jane-Anne came to help pack (all they've left me are two cups, one fork, one knife and one spoon for two weeks!). It was great having my girlfriends here because the last few days have been filled with suspense and it would have been difficult to be alone. I didn't say anything about not looking forward to this last nail-biter day, but Jane-Anne felt she wanted to come back and it was so great having her here for company on this last day of the count down.

This morning we had coffee and an incredible time of prayer - a great way to start the day. She brought one of her favorite CDs and so we rocked the apartment with praises to God as we packed. When it got hot, we took some cool drinks up on the hill under the maple tree and gorged on the beauty all around. I started to sing (not usually something anyone wants to hear!), but today I felt as though I could hit any note. My voice was clear and the words of special songs rolled through my remembrance, song after song. It's a rare and special memory (as my kids and grandkids can appreciate!)

I know Lola will miss the hill as much as I. The first four years of her life have been spent chasing balls on the hill, discovering scents of wild turkeys, barking at the cows and horse in the next field and lying beside my chair as I soak in the creation all around. It has been a great place to re-discover myself, find a fresh relationship with God and grow into my new life.

While my hopes have been high that I would be able to live in my own home once again, I accept this outcome as a sign that God has a better plan, to which I am not yet privy. While I don't look forward to moving into another rental, I am grateful that a lovely one has become available in Uxbridge where Lola will be welcome and I shall have adequate space for my needs.

I have a strong sense that, while this step did not turn out according to my wishes, the outcome is good and God has a plan. As a matter of fact, I am so sure He is doing something far more special than I could have imagined, that I am going to continue to blog daily. I am feeling very connected to those who have walked this journey with me and would like to continue so that when God's best plan unfolds, I will be able to share it and He will receive the glory He so richly deserves. :)

And so this is the last post of the "Anatomy of a Miracle" series. Tomorrow's post will have a different title.

Was this whole thing just a dumb exercise in futility? I don't think so. I think we need to live our lives aware of the possibility of God's supernatural intervention in the circumstances of our lives and giving Him openings to display His mighty power and grace. Only He knows whether the opportunities we provide for Him will be for our good. He is not a God who will show off and allow us to suffer in the process. In this case, He was willing to look as though He doesn't answer prayer or was not able to supply because apparently He knew that filling my request was not in my best interests. He is a wonderful Father. He loves us and we can trust His judgment in the matters of our lives. :)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #38 – 16 days to Move

Well - here I am on the eve of the last day of the condition. By tomorrow midnight, there will be no more suspense, no more drama. The tale will have been told.

This has been a very interesting journey – one that has held some amazing surprises. Every detail has come together for the purchase of this house except for the one factor which is totally in God's hands. This one factor could not only lift the latch on the door, welcoming me into my own home, but is the key evidence of whether or not God is in this adventure. If He is, the down payment will come by midnight tomorrow. If He's not, it won't. Simple. It's not often that we get such clear evidence of either being or not being in God's perfect will.

I have no problem admitting that I shall be disappointed if this doesn't happen. I've done a lot of "if it happens" planning. It seems so perfect and I still believe God has purpose in this move beyond a disruptive uprooting and replanting. However, we'll soon see.

Right now, I do not see any way possible that the funds could come in. I am doing absolutely nothing else to try to make it happen. In the beginning, I put out quotations for books and offered discounts for prepayments, but none of that bore any fruit. Now, if it happens,  it will be in a way I never could have imagined.

I'm going to bed. Only one sleep stands between me and resolution...

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #37 – 17 days to Move

Looks like we're going right down to the wire. Just two more sleeps (if I ever get to bed tonite!) before either a miracle happens or the curtain closes on this opportunity to own my own home once again.

One of my greatest concerns in all of this is that if I heard wrong and God has no intention of providing the miracle that would be necessary to turn the dream into a reality, curious skeptics who have been dropping by will say, "Ya - we knew there wouldn't be a miracle. How dumb can anyone be to think $40,000. is going to drop out of the sky? This just proves that God stuff isn't real."

If I thought that my unrealized hopes for a miracle were to drive anyone further away from God, it would be terrible.

Tonite I went to Wal-Mart to pick up some plastic packing totes (they're on for $5.00 ea.!!). When I was going through the check-out, the cashier commented on my bracelet, saying how beautiful it was. I took it off and gave it to her saying, "Here - I want you to have it as a reminder of how much Jesus loves you." She was flabbergasted and said, "Oh no, I can't possibly take it - and no - Jesus doesn't love me. I stopped believing that a long time ago."
"Yes, He does," I insisted. "His love in me is reaching out to you."
The look she gave me was that of a child, slowly, quietly sinking in quicksand, hardly daring to hope that someone would come and save her.
"Here, please, take it." I held it out to her.
"I can't," she said. "It's store policy. We can't take gifts from customers – but I want you to come back and see me. My name is Lynn." She pointed to her name tag. As much as she claimed not to believe, she desperately wanted to. I could see it in her eyes.
Another customer was ready to check out and, not wanting to interfere with her work, I nodded, smiled and promised to return.

Everyone needs to know how much Jesus loves us. If I could pull God's strings and have Him work a miracle for me just so that a skeptic reading this would believe, I would, because a relationship with Jesus is what life is all about. Inside every one of us is a God-shaped hole that can't be filled with anything else. People try to stuff it with sports, work, relationships, materialism - whatever - but nothing fits except God and so we live with a gnawing emptiness inside - a sense that something is missing - until we allow God in to fill us up with Himself. That's the only thing that brings real peace.

So – if a miracle doesn't happen in my life this time, the only thing it will prove is that I heard wrong and I should have just tried harder to find an apartment.

However – let's not throw in the towel yet - not until midnight on Wednesday! :)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #36 – 18 days to Move

Just a short post tonite as I have developed tendonitis in my right shoulder and must use it as little as possible. (Makes packing interesting!)
Just waiting to see what God is going to do – particularly with the condition on the offer ending on Wednesday! It will be very interesting to see His will unfold!! :)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #35 – 19 days to Move

I mentioned a few days ago that I had been fasting, seeking God for His perfect will. What I didn't detail was the difficulty of the first couple of days of the fast. It has been so hard having to sort through my belongings (especially photos), most of which are connected to pre-divorce memories when I thought my life was reasonably normal – but was actually built on flawed realities. The emotions that have been stirred, coupled with the deprivation of the fast, made me want to simply take a knock-out pill and wake up when everything was over!

In the midst of all this, one of my friends called and invited me to a movie. I very seldom go to the theater, but the escape was welcome. I knew full well I shouldn't be going to a movie in a time of fasting, but I stuffed my awareness under my desire to escape and went anyway. It was a movie that mirrored the values of today's secular society and would be totally acceptable to most people today. The reality was that it was peppered with the f-bomb, played with illicit sexuality and portrayed immorality as comedic. And there I sat – denying myself popcorn because I was "seeking God for a miracle."A slightly different f-bomb could have described the scene – "farce!"

When I look back on the sloppiness of my relationship with God that night, I am so ashamed. How dare I spend a holy time doing something so adverse to His kingdom principles – and pay for the experience???? Did I really think that God would just 'take the night off' and approve the movie? Did I think He would just tag along and be happy with whatever I chose to do with my time? Did I really expect Him to supply a financial miracle when I spent what money I had on something so foolish?

I have to turn this around. So – I'm doing it again and this time, I will do it His way. :)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #34 – 20 days to Move

Today plus five days until we know! I am so amazed at this extension – also very grateful to God for putting a "Plan B" in place, even if does have a miracle planned that will enable me to own my own home once again. It has removed the stress so that either way, I know I'll have a place to go. When the movers arrive at 8 a.m. on the 28th, I'll be able to point them to either Uxbridge or Caesarea.

Meanwhile, the girl who is looking after my realtor's clients while she's away, called today because other agents (who have clients who want the house) are getting impatient. She wanted to know how sure I am that the funds for the down payment will be in place by the 14th. I told her that I may not know until midnight on the 14th – because God is seldom early, never late but always right on time according to His perfect timing.

If it should happen that I heard wrong and God has no intentions of working a financial miracle, one of my greatest concerns will be that I have held up the selling of the house needlessly and have inconvenienced the realtor and the wonderful young fellow who built the house.

If I heard right and God does have a miracle planned, I am going to be over the moon with happiness, showing that young fellow this blog and demonstrating to him how God used him to build a house for this lady and gave him the wisdom and patience to accept the offer, agree to all the conditions and accept this crazy extension! It will be such a demonstration of the reality of God to him and I deeply hope that it will affect his life's journey.

Well... we'll know by the 14th. This time, there will be no extensions!

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #33 – 21 days to Move

After midnight again!

Jane and Jane-Anne (my two best friends) came over to help pack tonite. It was so great to have them both here pitching in the way good friends do. We've done so much of life together and seen each other through many high and low points. Tonight we made more memories. :)

I have wonderful friends and wouldn't dare begin to mention more names for fear of leaving out someone very special to me. I may not be wealthy in terms by which the world measures success, but I am rich in relationships. I love the people in my life. :) As we packed, the girls were chiding me for keeping so much stuff. I admit that I have wayyyyyy too many books but I love books. Although I'm not a knick-knacky kind of person, I can't possibly part with gifts given to me by loved ones. Everything has a story.

I went to Bible study at the Embassy this morning. It was amazing - as it always is. Pastor Doug's teaching is rich. Today he was talking about our walk with God. He told of a dream he once had that spoke to him of the importance of our walk. The Coles Notes version is that a twelve-year-old boy in his dream was suddenly attacked by an alligator that swallowed everything but the boy's feet which were sticking out of the alligator's mouth. In the dream, Pastor Doug ran quickly to rescue the boy and tried to stab the alligator in the neck - but the neck was so stiff and hard that he couldn't penetrate it with his knife. Then he thought he'd stab it in the heart, but he didn't know where to look for the heart and didn't even know if the alligator had a heart! Meanwhile, the memorable thing about the boy's feet were his sneakers - new white sneakers with a red tag on the side of each one. At that point, Pastor Doug woke up. After thinking about the dream, he believed God had shown him the importance of how we walk. If we are stiff-necked and heartless, God can't rescue anyone through our lives. As symbolized by the sneakers, it's all about how we walk with Him. He wants to have a relationship with us and communicate in a real way.

Pastor Doug spoke of El Shaddai, God's name meaning "the all-sufficient One," but went on to explain that the deeper meaning of this name is, "the God of ruin and devastation who is also the all-sufficient One." In our times of ruin and devastation, God is with us as our all-sufficiency.

I love that. Even in times when we think everything looks hopeless, the El Shaddai shows up and turns things around.

I am waiting for El Shaddai to move – by next Wednesday! :)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #32 – 22 days to Move

I apologize for being so late with today's blog at such a critical time! My computer crashed tonite and I wondered for awhile whether I would even be able to do the blog! I was afraid you'd think I'd crashed!

But no. Today was a great day. The seller agreed to a one-week extension of the condition! I am shocked! I was shocked when he accepted my offer – but now – an extension is amazing because there are other people wanting this house.

It has been a long, full, busy day. I've been formatting my books into e-books and lining them up with distribution channels today so that I'll hopefully have some residual income happening while I'm working on other projects. I have wanted to do this for quite awhile, but haven't had the time. It feels good to have gotten this far.

I've had a few ideas today about how I could wangle circumstances to make everything happen - but then I stepped back and said "no." This time, I'm going to wait for God. I really want this to be all about Him. If this purchase is in His perfect will, then He will work out the details far better than I can. 

All the peripherals seem to have taken shape so well - finding the house, being approved by the bank for a 2.1% mortgage, having my offer accepted, and now having the condition extended for a week. Wow! Even if the miracle down payment doesn't happen, I feel so much more sure of myself in going forward with life. I am really rebuilding. It's been a lot of hard work, but it's happening! The only thing that hasn't materialized is the miracle. But now there are seven more days!!!!!

I've been fasting for the past three days and so it was very interesting that my reading in Isaiah today was all about God's chosen fast. I've always thought it referred to loosening the chains of injustice for others and lifting the yoke of oppression for others – but today I understood that it can be applied to us personally as we deny ourselves in a gesture of drawing closer to God. I could see that God is loosening the chains of injustice in my life and lifting the yoke of oppression. It was very exciting to have that fresh revelation. I look forward to the days ahead...

What will happen?

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #31 – 23 days to Move

I have to run out and shall be gone for the evening - so thought I'd better leave a quick update.

First of all, thank you all for your continued prayers!

Yesterday, I met with a client who is going through a divorce and has to rent out half of his Uxbridge house while he's going through the court process. He would accept Lola and so a Plan B is in place. Another friend has an apartment that would be available at the end of the month and he too, would accept Lola, but it would involve a lot of commuting as his place is in Bowmanville. So - I actually have Plans B and C - welcome respites from the pressure.

However, I must continue my course in case God's plan provides for me to purchase instead of rent. Before my realtor left for her cruise, she prepared the paperwork for a week's extension on the condition, which would give me until the 14th instead of the 7th. At first, I wasn't going to take advantage of it because I felt that if God wants to do this, He doesn't need an extension. He's not on a budget and a need of $40.00 is no different to Him than a need of $40,000. My Father owns the cattle on a thousand hills! He has His own laws of economy. As long as I obey His requirements (which I do), He has promised to look after my needs. He has done it over and over again, particularly in these past four years.

However, since both my banker and my realtor are suggesting an extension, and my close friend (whose discernment I trust) felt that the Lord spoke to her about one, I am considering it. Her point was that the children of Israel thought they were going to be delivered on a particular day, but the exodus was delayed for God's purposes and His perfect timing. Moses was not very popular during that time, but he continued to obey God and the moving of the people to their own home eventually happened. I'm going to read the story again tonite when I get home.

Meanwhile, the drama may continue for a few more days - if the seller agrees to an extension...

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #30 – 24 days to Move

Okay - we're getting down to the wire now. This is Monday and I need to have $30,000. in the bank by Wednesday, with another $10,000. ready for closing costs on the 26th. and I have no idea where any of that is coming from.

Someone asked me yesterday if I have a plan "B" ready just in case. After all, The moving trucks are coming on the 28th of this month!

No – there is no plan "B." I set my course about a month and a half ago when, after being advised by my landlord that he needed my space and then discovering that no suitable place was going to allow me to keep my dog, I began to sense that perhaps God wanted me to buy, not rent, my next home. Despite the fact that I've enjoyed just renting for the first time since university days, I contacted a realtor and set about trying to find a place to buy, with full knowledge that I didn't have a down payment, but trusting that if God wanted me to buy, He would supply my need. My realtor is a Christian and has full knowledge of my situation. She is trusting God with me.

Am I being presumptuous, expecting God to jump just because I tell Him I have a need? Am I "reaching too high" as suggested by a concerned friend? Do I think I can just snap my fingers and see God jump? Am I putting myself in a precarious position? Am I putting God in a precarious position? Am I being fool hardy? Reckless? Ridiculous?

These are all questions asked not only by some friends, but by me in quiet moments of reflection as temporal realities and dimensions of the Spirit collide.

What would a plan "B" look like? It would have to be a rental large enough to accommodate my needs and welcome my dog. I am not going to lose Lola. She is my family now. I have lost enough family. I'm not losing more and I don't believe God is requiring that of me. While I hunted for an apartment at first, there's no point right now because, even if I were to find one, I wouldn't put a deposit on it until after Wednesday – and if I can't put a deposit on something, it will be gone and my time will have been wasted.

So - no. There's no plan "B" and I don't believe I'm going to need one. I have peace.

What will happen if midnight Wednesday comes and nothing has changed? Will I go off the deep end? Will I be embarrassed? Will I lose faith?

If midnight Wednesday comes and there has been no change, I shall look around the corner of life – in the Spirit – and find what God wants me to do next. He is leading me. I can't see clearly into His realm to see exactly what He is doing, but He is there and He is the only thing I have in life that is sure.

Last night at church, the pastor asked if there was anyone who would like to give their life to Jesus – to be transformed by allowing Him to be part of their life. I turned around to a row of young people behind me and asked if any of them would like to go to the front to accept Jesus. I looked deeply into the beautiful brown eyes of one young woman and said, "You will never know your full purpose in life without Jesus and He will change your life. He loves you more than you will ever be able to understand. I will go to the front with you if you want to receive Him." Holding hands, we went to the front and her life was changed. She would never be alone again.

I would never have been able to look into that young woman's eyes and communicate faith to her if I had not learned to trust God over these past 32 years of knowing Him and seeing His faithfulness. Why would I doubt Him now?

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #29 – 25 days to Move

I started to pack yesterday and had a minor meltdown gathering up photos of happier days with my family, etc. Jane-Anne came over and we took a break up on the hill. Things are always better up there sitting in the Muskoka chairs my son Todd made, absorbing the view that goes on for miles and gnawing at the bones of life, trying to find the marrow with a good friend.

By the time Jane-Anne left, I was in a much healthier frame of mind and so continued my packing until after midnight.

This morning at church, I bumped into an old friend, a lawyer who I hope to use for closing the real estate deal. I didn't mean to tell him the whole story when we first began to talk, but it came out in the conversation and I'm sure he's never had a situation like this before. At this point, if he actually expects me to show up in his office with papers to be signed, he has as much faith as I do and that is kind of crazy in this situation.

When I got home, my friend Gaynor had forwarded some tweets to me (I draw the techno line in the sand at tweeting:). However, they were appreciated.

From: @TamiHeim
He watches in the hard places and will gloriously come at the perfect hour - without fail.

From: @LisaHBryant
"You can't out-ask, out-request, or out-pray the ability of God. " @priscillashirer

From: @MaxLucado
For all the things God does, there is one he refuses to do. He refuses to keep a list of my wrongs.

Three more sleeps until Wednesday when I have to have the down payment in the bank. God is able.

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #28 – 26 days to Move

Yay!!! June 7th is only four days away! Just four more sleeps until I see the mercy and grace of God once more.

The past four years have been such an incredible time of learning to trust God. When I sold our home, after all of the legal expenses were paid and I extricated myself from the mess, there was nothing left to start life over again. Time after time, God stepped in with a miracle and provided.

One time, while I was still packing the house, I was upset because it was my son's birthday. Our tradition was to have everyone home for a nice birthday celebration, complete with candles and homemade chocolate cake.  It was always a big deal and I loved having my precious family all gathered together. Because of the horrible events that shattered our family that year, none of my kids would come home. It was too painful for them. I thought if only I could take them out to a restaurant, we could at least be together. However, I couldn't afford it. I had no money. I had had to close our business down and there was not only no income, but I had great expenses. The closer it came to the birthday (which was the following Tuesday), the more troubled I became. What would I do? Then God stepped in. On Friday, an old family friend arrived (with no knowledge of the impending b-day) and said that God had spoken to him to give me $500.00. At first I protested, saying that he couldn't possibly give me such a gift! But then he said that I had to take it because God had instructed him, but that there was a condition - that being that I take my family out for dinner! I'm sure my jaw must have dropped because I was dumbfounded.
"Did you know Tim's birthday was coming?" I asked.
"No," he said, "but maybe that's why God sent me here!"

Another time, I was down to my last few cents, with no idea where the next dollar would come from. By this time, I was living in the apartment where I have lived for the past four years. It was a Sunday morning and I was in church. When the minister asked the ushers to receive the offering, I took an envelope and put every cent I had into the envelope. Then I took the Canadian Tire money from my wallet and put that in, too. I figured that if I was going to have this little money, I might as well give it all away and have none. I didn't put my name on the envelope because I didn't want anyone to know that I was the one who gave such a meager offering and added Canadian Tire money. The next day, I was up on the hill walking my dog and I said, "You know Lord, I really need some money. You said that you're my husband now and I need you to look after me!" (At the time, I was still in school learning my new graphic design trade.) As I walked back towards the apartment, I decided to get the mail. There was a cheque from Gordon Williams for $5,000. - a deposit on his next book which I didn't realize was coming at that time. Another envelope contained a GST return of over $200.00. i could hardly believe my eyes. Once again, I was flooded with gratitude for the faithfulness of God.

I could go on and on telling about the miracles of the last four years. I wish so much that I had journaled faithfully because I've forgotten so many. Experiencing the grace of God has been a way of life for me.

It's not that I have sat by and lazily waited for God to drop golden coins from Heaven. In actual fact, I've never worked so hard in my life as I have over these years. Many, many, many nights I've worked all night long and watched the dawn bring the day from where I sat behind my computer. Sometimes I would think about the people who were able to sleep regular hours and have little pity parties for myself – but then I would finish a project for a client and be so happy to be able to have created something that would help them with their work and, at the same time, generate some income for myself. Never, in all the years of my marriage, had I been responsible for the income of the home. I had made some money on the odd book or whatever, but had not been soley responsible for survival. This has been a new experience and I am so grateful for the opportunities I have been given.

'Nuff said for today.

When my friend, Jane-Anne, was praying for me today, the Lord told her, "The latch has been given." Very interesting. We'll see what happens Wednesday!!

To tell you the truth, I am going to be so glad when Wednesday midnight comes because, despite the fact that I trust God to take me through, this has been somewhat stressful. I am "waiting to exhale."

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #27 – 27 days to Move

Here we are in my moving month. The only things standing between me and home are 27 days, packing all my stuff and $40,000. that I don't have right now.

I've been checking Google analytics to see whether anyone is following these words I write everyday. Despite the fact that only two brave souls (thank you Sarah and Candace) have declared themselves as followers, there are over 70 people checking it out regularly. However, interest has begun to decline slightly in the past couple of days because there's not much happening. I went with friends to see Canada Day fireworks last nite, but there are none on this page – nothing but me waiting here, trusting God to come through by the midnight hour to look after me. It's not very exciting.

I know that some people think this is ridiculous. What if we all just sat down and waited for God to orchestrate our lives?

I understand. I know it seems ridiculous – but I have peace about it. I don't know what God is going to do by the seventh of July, but He will do something. He has prepared a place for me to live and He'll make a way for me to get there.

And I haven't just sat by twiddling my thumbs. I've done all that I can do. I don't need to repeat it all – anyone who hasn't been following this journey can go back and read over three weeks of earlier posts to see the progression of events.

There may not be fireworks on this site now, but just wait until my miracle comes! Then - then there will be fireworks! I shall be so excited to see what God does. This situation is impossible for me – but not for God. Nothing is too hard for Him.

Today's reading included: "The man (woman) who makes Me his refuge will inherit the land." (Is. 57:13b)

The Anatomy of a Miracle – Post #26 – 28 days to Move

My friend Jane-Anne was over today and we were talking about "the situation" and how we both have a deep-down peace about this whole thing. I feel as though I am finally learning to "wait on God." I have spent a lot of years fretting about this and fretting about that. In the end, God has always worked things out. All the fretting was for nothing. The lesson has been a long time in the learning!

Wednesday by midnight will tell the tale. Miracle? No miracle?
There will be a miracle.